Fear and Loathing

You know what gets me? When that guy, you know the one, that supposedly runs the country, gets up in front of a crowd or a camera or something and tells the world that we’re not afraid of the terrorists that hate freedom. Okay, I’m totally paraphrasing, but you know what I mean. This gets me because you know what? He’s lying. I’m totally afraid of those bastards. Who isn’t? And if you’re not afraid of them, well, you’re pretty scary yourself.

Because they are mad, crazy, SOBs. It’s one thing to say you’re not afraid of some rationally behaving enemy because you might, you just might, get some insight in to what their goals are and how they want to achieve those goals. But when they’re working towards something vague and apocalyptic and they don’t value even their own lives, there’s no way of telling what the hell they’re going to do next. And I don’t know about you, but I find that fucking terrifying.

I’m not saying that I’m going to crawl in to a bunker and start living on rations. I’m not going to stop taking the bus or planning long haul flights to Europe. I’m just saying that the President travels in Airforce One with a full on security contingent and I take Metro where everyone is carrying a backpack. When was the last time the President took the London Underground? Has he taken a commercial flight in the last five years? It’s all fine and well for him to say he’s not afraid, after all, he’s essentially bunkered and living on rations, right?

I was booked to fly Seattle to Amsterdam not long after 9/11. And I wrote to the White House, because there they were, all over the news telling me that I wasn’t afraid and that I should, what the fuck, go shopping. I asked them if they were going to personally guarantee my safety in the same way that they’d guaranteed the safety of their own sweet selves. Not surprisingly, I didn’t hear back from them and hey, knowing the Bush administration, I’m probably blacklisted as a smartass somewhere. So much for my future in government.

You know what I’d like to hear someone in power say? I’d like to hear this: “Those are some scary bastards and they are up to no good. But please, trust that we are doing everything we can to unravel the rat’s nest that they’re crawling out of. And in the meantime, try to chill. Don’t freak out on your neighbors because they’re brown or because they’re running off the bus with a backpack because they can see that if they don’t haul ass, they’re going to miss their connection. Try to believe us; we want this to end as much as you do. We want to take those crazy bastards down.” That would show some courage. Instead, we’re all about the absence of fear. What the hell?

Those bastards, those crazy terrorists, I hate them. I really do. But I also loathe the administration that tells me how I feel about what’s happening in the world. Because they’re lying. I AM AFRAID. But I’m not ashamed of it. Of course I’m afraid. Because I am a reasonable, thinking human being. Those people that stand up in front of the cameras and tell me that I’m not afraid are cowards. They’re the ones afraid to admit to the fear that actions like the London bombings generates. My heart goes out to the people of London, who surely are afraid, but also, very brave.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear.
–Mark Twain

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