Rock and Roll: Four Vignettes

I’m still grounded, working many hours weekly on my day job, trying to slap out work for my freelance markets, and if I turn 180 degrees from my monitor, I will see my music stand, an open ukulele case beside it on the floor. While I have some travel writing time carved out in the near future, that time is alotted to assignments, not to updating Nerd’s Eye View. I miss it the writing time, but it’s not to be right now. In the meantime, I’ve been playing with Facebook because it doesn’t require my full focus like writing essays does. And I’ve been writing these silly short plays, little scenes from my musical pursuits.

1. Roadies  

Setting: Our House. Actors: Me, The Husband (TH)

Me: [Gathering stuff together to head out to record.] &@%$ this is a lot of stuff to carry around.
TH: That’s what you get for choosing the rock and roll life style.
Me: I didn’t choose it, man, IT CHOSE ME.

[End scene.]

2. The Domestic Lives of Rock Stars  

Setting: Our House. Actors: Me, The Husband (TH)

Me: [Doing something weird while wearing a ridiculous hat. Standard operating procedure.]
TH: [The look.]
Me: Do you want to exchange me for something a little less weird?
TH: Not…. yet.
Me:  Okay, but if you’re going to, could you do it while my rock star trajectory is on the rise? While I still have a chance of getting something hot? Don’t wait until I’m washed up and drug ravaged.
TH: [The look, again.]

[End scene.]

3. The Blues

Setting: The Castaways Secret Recording Studio. Actors: Me: having made it through the second position chords, but blowing it righteously on the first position chords.
M: The Castaways bass player and audio engineer.

M: You’re hitting the wrong beat. You gotta feel it. You gotta get in touch with your inner blues singer.
Me: Oh, my people been done wrong.
M: I wonder if there are any Jewish blues singers. There have to be.

[Recording stops. We go to the Internet.]

M: Huh. Blind Dan Smullyan. Who knew?
Me: Well, it makes sense, right?

[End scene.]

4. High School Romance  

Setting: A friend’s kitchen. Actors:  Me and S. S is best categorized as “Old Music Guy.”

S: Bands are like high school romances. They’re always changing. You hook up, you break up, maybe you get back together, maybe you find someone else…
Me: NOOOOOOOOO! You don’t understand! THIS IS REAL!

[Slams locker, stomps off to AP English clutching book of Ibsen plays.]

[End scene.]