Sleeping BH: Go to bed. Sleep.
AH: Locate Harley. If he’s outside, chase him inside. Close all the windows, regardless of temperature because there’s a good chance your sleep will be interrupted if a dog walks by, a package is delivered, a large truck rolls down the street, any number of incidents. If it’s street sweeper night, wake up at about 1am to alarmed barking as the truck goes by. Pet Harley and reassure him until the truck goes back the other direction, then go back to sleep.
Morning BH: Sit as long as you like. Surf the web, make more coffee, dawdle.
AH: TIME TO GO FOR WALKIES ARE YOU NOT DRESSED YET? Get dressed even though you are far from ready and go for a walk, rain or shine.
Walkies BH: Put on shoes, take a 20 minute or so head clearing stretch through the neighborhood. Maybe chat with a neighbor, but most likely not.
AH: Once the interpretive dance “OMG ARE WE LEAVING THE HOUSE!” has reached completion, head out the back door and down the alley. Snort and bounce at the places where known dogs exist, engage in full on barking at any unknown dogs encountered by surprise. Smell ALL THE THINGS, every single one, sometimes doubling back for a re-smelling if the human is moving too fast. “WHAT EXACTLY IS YOUR DAMN HURRY I NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT, EXACTLY THIS SMELL IS AND WHEN IT WAS PLACED HERE.” Answer “What kind of dog is that, my, he is so cute, can I pet him?” several times. Complete 20 minute route in 45 minutes or more.
Getting Anything from the Pantry, BH: Open cabinet, retrieve item, close cabinet.
AH: Open cabinet, retrieve item. Look down at Harley, who knows that the cabinet contains treats. Consider if it’s treat time or not. Put item down, hand treat to Harley. Retrieve item. Look down again to make sure Harley has taken the treat and moved so as to not step on him.
Leaving the House BH: Gather belongings, pick up keys, leave house.
AH: Locate Harley. If he’s outside, chase him inside. Turn on the radio. Gather belongings. Sit down at kitchen table until Harley settles into his crate. When he’s settled, quietly sneak out the back door without saying goodbye.
Coming Home, BH: Open door, enter house. put down belongings, go about the usual business.
AH: Make sure there’s nothing in your hands. Unlock door. See hyper-alert Harley at the top of the stairs. Open door. Experience the equivalency of a ticker tape parade, a hero’s welcome, and a personalized Valentine’s Day all rolled into one. As Harley swirls about you in wiggly little circles, bouncing, tail wagging, and making squeaky little happy noises, say, “Dude, I was gone for like, 20 minutes, I just went to buy milk. Calm down.” Be not so secretly glad that there’s no way he’s calming down. Forget all the barking, sniffing, under-footing, and everything else until it happens again, probably 20 minutes later. Maybe sooner.
I am enjoying this so much! You have definitely nailed the change in routines BH and AH. Thanks for the warm laugh.
“A tired dog is a good dog.”
That was the BEST advice I ever heard when it comes to owning a frisky, gotta-run-and-jump-all-the-time kinda dog. It’s probably true of me, too. Haha!!