Chomp

I lost a molar.

That sounds like I left it on the bus, but nope, a big guy who looked like a boxing coach — “Just call me Joey” — freed it from my jaw in very little time. I was knocked out for the proceedure ($809); the anxiety beforehand was worse than the pain after. I have a pizza burn-esque patch on the roof of my mouth and some dull aching.

And I’m tired, very, very tired. The first day of that was probably a hangover from the stress and pain I’d been feeling from the broken chopper, plus, I had to cycle through the anesthesia. I am reminding myself that a guy took one of my bones ($481) and… that’s a whole thing, even if it’s a small bone. I haven’t needed the presciption painkillers which is great because that shit will fuck you up, but I have needed a lot of sleep.

I had a bone graft ($710) so I can get an implant; the graft takes an estimated six to nine months to heal. That mean more imaging ($140). Fingers crossed it sticks and I don’t need more surgery. The second proceedure ($5700) isn’t scheduled yet but it also has a long healing time. Assuming that goes well, I’ll still need a permanent crown.

The whole process could take a year and it will cost somewhere between $8000-$10,000 dollars. That’s before the $1200 I spent on the work that did not fix my chopper in the first place.

My insurance covers imaging, that’s about it. It’s anger about insurance and health care costs, not pain, causing me to grit my teeth through the recovery process.

The clinic suggested I could forego sedation if I wanted to reduce my costs. “Absolutely fucking not,” I thought. I would do full sedation for a standard cleaning were it an option. The other money saving option is to get a bridge — which isn’t as effective as an implant. Or I can just stay gap-toothed for the rest of my days and risk bone loss and other complications. Fantastic choices, no?

I’m so lucky to be in a place where the expense is not freaking me out, but that hasn’t spared me from being enraged all the same. I had a medically neccessary proceedure on a standard issue body part and none of it is covered by insurance.

Last fall I changed my health — not dental, the other stuff, the stuff that’s not teeth or eyes — insurance carrier because they didn’t cover my doctor anymore. I had a prescription refilled and when I went to the pharmacy to pick it up, they told me it would be $200.

“No, it won’t,” I said.

That pharmacy is not contracted with my new insurance provider, turns out. They do, however, have their own discount plan and once they put me on that, the prescription was $19.20. I won’t use that pharmacy again. There’s another one, a mile away, that is contracted with my plan. It all worked out, but what if I hadn’t balked, what if I’d just accepted the first price they gave me? Why didn’t they give me the discount price up front?

We know the answer to that question: It’s the capitalism.

Well meaning types will suggest I should jet off to Mexico or Romania or whatever to have the work done, it would save me some money and bonus, vacation in Mexico or Romania or whatever. I get it. I won’t detail the reasons that doesn’t work for me. It also doesn’t address a massive failure to provide affordable care to millions of Americans.

I have been self-employed most of my career. There was a time when it was not possible for me to get health insurance at all; no one was selling an individual plan and the state plan had a waiting list. Imagine that, a waiting list to get health insurance! I’m not yet old enough for Medicare — and even if I was, it wouldn’t cover dental or optical.

We already know that if you have money, you can get decent healthcare and if you don’t, welp, you’re on your own with your medical needs and debt, pal. If you have agency, you can fight the system to some degree and if you don’t, welp, that’s on you for not having the resources to navigate a hostile process.

Delta Dental’s Washington CEO got paid a $4.1 million salary in 2024, with an additional $500k in other compensation.

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